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Year 2000 Services
 
Y2K is one of the best opportunities for bilking which has ever been offered to FBN.  To top off what should be some minor programming and system modifications is the need for many members of western society to doubt the security of their lifestyle.  Add in the right-wing wackos which have been watching the horizon for any signs of Armageddon and you have a boom in the survivalist business and in the computer systems business.  We at FBN fully intend to sow FUD and use this opportunity to maximize billings and the havoc we wreak on the marketplace.

The first suggestion is always to purchase new systems.  We have this test software which fails everything, even new Compaq and Dell servers.  Little does the customer realize that some systems will do Y2K dates okay, they just will not roll-over into January 1,2000 automatically.  Set the BIOS date manually and reboot and they work fine. 

FBN has sold customers replacement systems and charged a recycling fee for taking away old systems which the customer was led to believe were not Y2K compliant.  These systems were then sold at a premium price to other customers as being Y2K compliant.  If only we could get away with these types of stunts forever!

The FUD is taking such a toll customers are persuaded to replace systems which in normal operation have no date awareness.  Customers can be persuaded to replace PCs used only for word processing where the operators are so clueless they don't even use the date code functions in documents.  Most of the time the system date is set to 198? And no one notices the difference. 

FBN will never advise customers, while some 486 systems will never retain a Y2K date after a reboot, the system can be made fully useable by manually entering a Y2K date at boot-up.  Customers are never advised adding time and date lines to the Autoexec.bat file will allow the operating system to run with a Y2K date.  And, do Y2K transactions properly too!

If only this could go on forever.  Y2K almost makes it too easy to scam customers.  Unfortunately January 1, 2000 is going to be the start of a massive hangover where those who threw money at perceived Y2K problems will wonder, "What was I thinking?".

To help sow the FUD a number of standard terms and phases are used to further baffle and confuse the customer.  We call it "Classic Y2K Paranoia Speak".  Some of the better examples follow: "unexpected conjunction of improbable events", "emergent failure",  "failure of intrinsic network components", "internetwork connectivity infrastructure interconnection failure",  "the mathematical difficulty of testing entire network", "all possible failure points and their interactions with the network as a whole", "mostly uninterrupted", "in complicated systems we can expect the unexpected", "complicated systems must interoperate", "highly complex information dependent accident-prone systems", "the Titanic's maiden voyage occurred on a 99.9% iceberg-free ocean", ....

In addition to the fine services offered by FBN Technical Services we are proud to announce FBN will be reselling the complete product line of FBN Associates.  Complete product information available on their website.
 

Year 2000 Song
Year BC to AD Letter
   

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© 2002  The Twelve Year Old Kid From Across The Street
December 31, 2002